When somebody we know (who shall be nameless) weighed herself before her shower the other day, she was delighted to see she'd lost 20 pounds. Thinking about it later in the day, she mused, "I haven't changed my eating habits. I don't notice my clothes are any looser, but, what the heck, 20 pounds is 20 pounds," and with that thought, she had a lovely day.
The next day, she decided to weigh herself again, and found out the 20 pounds had returned. "Now, what's the difference?" she thought. "Ah, today I have on my glasses." That was it! Those darned glasses weighed 20 pounds ....
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Nobody asked us, but we want to know if the people who made the decision to build half a freeway live, work, or do business on Highway 50 and Lompa Lane? We can only imagine what it's going to be like when the first half is completed. All those people spilling onto Highway 50, going east or west to find a way south. How may trips will it take before everyone is back on Carson Street? Half a freeway, sort of like half a bra, one side's up and perky... the other side's flat as a pancake. This idea gets the "Big Raspberry Award."
Pfffft....
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Nevada usually ranks low in national standings in whatever poll is being taken, so it's great news to find out we have the No.1 Legislative Web site in the nation. Congratulations Andy Harvey, et al! Hallelujah ... we're number one ... we're number one...
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Now, for all of you who can't drive, use your blinkers. We are not mind readers and can't guess which way you are going. Have you passed your driver's test? Do you know you're in a car? A Lexus SUV the other day (yeah, we know your license number) cruised through two stop signs without slowing down and without using signals, obviously oblivious, so go back to tricycles if you don't know the law ...
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And, while we're on a roll, bright headlights in our eyes at night, rolling stops, jamming through school zones, driving 45 mph on the freeway (particularly in the fast lane), tailgating, etc., etc., etc. To quote Charlie Brown ... "Arrrrgh!"
Maybe we should be like the Germans and charge $1,500 for a driver's license. They also have to be 18 and take a driving class before they get one. We might value it more. Come to think of it, maybe a marriage license should be the same way...
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More car stuff. We see balloons and flags on car dealers' lots. Makes us want to rush right out and buy a car ....
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Congratulations to the teachers at Eagle Valley Middle School for receiving the Michael Milken awards, one this year and two in the past. Pretty darned neat.
Most people quote Shakespeare, others of us don't (CRS). Carolyn's favorite is, "Never back up when you can go ahead" (she's sure someone said it sometime). Maizie's is by the Duke of Windsor, "Never pass up a chance to relieve yourself" At least, it's practical.
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And a lovely young lady wrote a friend a thank-you note. "Thank you for the 20$, now I've got 3 20$ pills [sic]! I'm going to save them for something. Love." Her mom, with a big grin, said later, "Gee, I didn't know she had a drug problem ..." Made us smile.
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Talk about "revisionist history"...the Smithsonian Institute in Washington, D.C. currently has the Enola Gay (the bomber that dropped the atomic bomb on Hiroshima in WWII) displayed, mentioning nine crew members who were there. Now the fact that there were 12 members aboard (the correction was sent to them, along with the names of the other three crew members) was discounted by the Smithsonion. "The display is already up and we won't change it." Excuse us ... what idiot says you can't correct a mistake when it pops up? Bureaucracy never fails to amaze us ....
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We have a solution for spam e-mail. Just make their return addresses accept replies, so we can flood their e-mail with our answers. You send out a million, you get a million back. Ought to keep 'em busy for a day or two. Congress, listen up ...
Carolyn DeMar and Maizie Harris Jesse have been expressing their opinions on Carson City goings-on for years. Now, they're in the Nevada Appeal. Send your questions to editor@nevadaappeal.com.
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