Watch out! You may be sneaking up on yourself

Things that go bump in the night ... we heard about a lady in Carson who called the police in the dead of night because she saw an intruder in her house ... then, when the police got there, she couldn't get to her front door to let them in because the intruder was in the way, predicting her every move to let them in. Turns out the dim light of night was behind her and the "intruder" was her shadow. No doubt the police consider this an "open and shut" case ...

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Our senior senator, Harry Reid, is featured on the cover of "Silver & Blue," the magazine of the University of Nevada, Reno, in the July/August issue. The picture was taken by Jeff Ross and should be used for all future political runs ... the "boy" from Searchlight is "lookin' goooood" ...

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Kokomo, Ind. news item: Seems fire captain Kevin Shaffer is in trouble with the department for using his fire truck to water his lawn. But all is not as it seems ... the water left over from a training exercise is usually dumped in the street or down a drain ... he just recycled it. Now they've fined him ... seems to us (in a state that needs water), he did the smart thing ... next time, dump it on the chief's lawn ...

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Good stuff going on: St. Gall's Annual Awesome Rummage Sale is happening August 5th and 6th at the church in Gardnerville (call 782-2852 for information and directions) ... loads of wonderful things to buy and help the church, too. The Sheriff's Office is sponsoring National Night Out on Tuesday, Aug. 2, at Mills Park (887-2500) ... it's a wonderful time for the whole family ... free drinks and hot dogs, and lots of things to do ... plus, meet your favorite deputy, and watch the SWAT team at work ... it's a "don't miss."

Also, the Prison Arts and Crafts show will be July 30 and 31 from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m ... lots of rock art, leather work, paintings and crocheted items will be available ... and proceeds go to help Empire Elementary ... it's a great "giving-back" project.

Lastly, the Carson City Democrats are preparing for a tour of Yucca Mountain on Oct. 3 ... if you're interested (and you don't even have to be a Democrat), you need to contact them today, IMMEDIATELY, at 214 W. Robinson (841-3367) to sign up and get your clearance ... it takes a couple of months to "clear," so get down there now ... it's a great and informative trip ...

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Ken Fraser sent us some wise tidbits ... "Whatever hits the fan, will not be evenly distributed" ... "Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car" ... "I love cooking with wine ... sometimes I even put it in the food ... " (now that's the Ken we know and love) and "Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places ... "

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And Rex Baggett tells us of a couple who went to the State Fair every year ... seems the husband always wanted to take a helicopter ride, but his wife kept saying, "Fifty bucks is fifty bucks," so they never took the ride. After about 10 years of this, the pilot steps up to the husband and says, "I will give you both a ride for free, if you promise not to make a peep while we're up there."

The wife agrees to this and they both get in. Once in the air, the pilot makes a few loops and dips, but, by golly, there's not a peep out of either one of them. He finally lands, and says, "Man, you don't owe me a dime ... there wasn't a peep out of either one of you."

Suddenly, he notices the wife isn't there ... "What happened?" shouts the pilot.

"My wife fell out a couple of loops ago," says the man. "Why didn't you tell me?" shrieks the pilot. "Fifty bucks is fifty bucks ... "

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Lance Armstrong is to be congratulated for winning his seventh Tour de France ... an amazing record and feat by anyone's reckoning ... we also remember the first American to win there, Greg LeMond ... he made the world aware that American bicyclists were ready for world competition ... both are superb athletes.

But, before both of them, Maizie was in Salzburg, Austria, in 1978 with Margaret Hillenbrand, when they met the Giros-Mitachi racing team at breakfast one day in their hotel ... they were on their way from the Tour to another race (in those days they would actually bicycle between tours) ... they got to talk to the team, which included Joop Zoetemelk, the runner-up that year. He was runner-up in 1979, as well, and finally won it in 1980 ... a great time and memory ...

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DeeAnn Parsons strikes again ... "Two robins were sitting in a tree ... "I'm really hungry," says the first one, "let's fly down and find some lunch."

So they flew down to some newly plowed ground and found some delicious worms to eat. They ate and ate until they could eat no more. "I'm so full, I don't think I can fly back up into the tree," said the first one. "Then let's lay back here and bask in the sun," says the other. So, they laid back and basked in the sun ... just then, a tomcat came by and gobbled them up.

As the cat sat washing his face afterward, he thought, "I just love baskin' robins."

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We took a poll to ask what the concessions stand at the WNCC Wildcats field should serve during the baseball games: Steve Wassner wants a bratwurst on a hard roll with hot mustard and a side of sauerkraut ... Judge John Tatro wants an 18-inch chorizo link served on a roll ... Carolyn just wants a hot dog, and Maizie wants garlic French fries ... or maybe quiche, or chateau briand, or baked Alaska ... (you get the picture).

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Woody's Diner has two great chefs these days ... Chuey is their regular chef who turns out a mean breakfast, and Chris Hynes is putting out some five-star food on Mondays and Tuesdays ... any day is worth a tasty try ...

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Has anyone else noticed that gas prices still suck? Yuck ... (from the "poetry corner") Or that Robert Novak ought to go to jail? (Thanks, Paula ... )

n Carolyn DeMar and Maizie Harris Jesse are longtime Carson City residents. Write to them at editor@nevadaappeal.com.