'Life just isn't fair'

So, have you ever finished your homework, and then the next day in class you find out that the teacher decided not to grade it? Have you ever gotten blamed for something you didn't do? Have you ever been told to do something you didn't want to do?

Well, I'll bet you know this is coming, but life isn't fair. In fact, no one ever said it would be. I'm sure you've heard that a lot from your parents, your teachers, or maybe even your friends. At least I know I've gotten a little tired of hearing it myself.

I mean, I am going through a very hard time right now. I have just had to make some decisions that I didn't want to make, and it is just really hard. Even in school. I have been dealing with some people that I just don't want anything to do with.

A lot of people struggle with thinking they are always right and can't take it when people tell them they're wrong. And it is not just some people. I mean, I do it, too. It is really hard sometimes to admit when we're wrong. Instead, we tend to make excuses and say that it just isn't fair. Then they meet you with that saying again. So, it kind of seems like everyone knows that life isn't fair.

Personally, I do not think that being fair to someone else has anything to do with whether that person is fair to me. All that matters is that I treat them with respect and treat them with fairness myself. Take the consequences. And if something isn't fair, just look at the sun and remember that the world doesn't revolve around you. There are 6 billion people on this earth, and that means there are 6 billion different wills out there. So no one is going to get everything they want. We all have to learn to let other people have their way sometimes.

It takes courage and a lot of strength, but even if the person you don't like treats you unfair, again, you shouldn't treat them the same. Be different. You might not believe it, but you could change that person by treating him or her with the same fairness you long for. You might think you should treat them badly in order for them to stop because then they would see how it feels. But most likely, they just need to be treated with kindness. When I see someone who is nice to a really rude person, it lets me know that he or she is even stronger than the bully. And it's true. Bullies just put you down because they want to "feel" powerful. They're just too weak to find what really gives people strength.

And I know this is all really hard, but think about it this way: Every single time you get your way, someone is making a sacrifice for you. So why can't you make some sacrifices for them?

Unfairness has only just begun. Our whole life will be filled with people, decisions, and problems that will be unfair sometimes. But if you know that now, you should be able to deal with it better when it's an even more important situation later on in your life. So when you think something is unfair, you will have a choice to make: either to be negative and whine about it or make the right decision and accept the outcome. Just remember, the next time someone tells you life isn't fair, life can still be good.

- Christina Connell, a freshman at Carson High School, writes a monthly column for the Whatever page.