The Popcorn Stand: Only 1,000 days to the 2020 presidential election.

Beginning today we only have 1,000 days to the 2020 presidential election and I’m stunned everybody’s so behind, including the media, when it comes to “the most important election of our lifetime” as it’s just around the corner. I mean it’s just a 1,000 days away.

Oprah hasn’t been caught off guard as she’s already backed out from running, which I think is a good thing. Now Oprah can stick to her Taco Fiesta Nights she loves so much. Still no word on what The Rock will do, but as I’ve said before if he decides to run, he must go by The Rock.

I think that should be a rule from now on, all presidential candidates — and elected presidents — should be known by one word. Regardless of what you think about The Donald, I do think it would be pretty cool if news types concerned about being dignified with names like Wolf Blitzer would always have to refer to our president as The Donald.

The one exception being Nicolas Cage, although maybe The Cage would work. You knew I had to mention Cage as a candidate for president for no particular reason other than my unexplainable fascination with the guy.

I mean he does look sort of presidential on the cover of the January issue of The Rake Magazine in his cool hat with a beard. By the way, The Rake as I figure it is some kind of men’s clothing magazine, so why it’s called The Rake, I have no idea. But back to Cage, I hope he keeps his beard because I think it would be pretty cool if we had a president with a beard. Or at least a presidential candidate.

Actually, of course, it would be a farce if some eccentric guy on some obscure magazine became our president. That’s why I’m sounding the alarm and making sure people know there’s just 1,000 days to as I said until “the most important election of our lifetime.”

Only 1,000 days people. Time’s a wastin’.

— Charles Whisnand

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